Fail.

Lately we’ve been a bit of a roll at PJP, at least by our standards.  We’ve been baking (and selling) a lot of pies and the crying has been kept to a minimum.  And so I think that when one hits a good streak, the universe needs to serve up a day where the wheels all just fall off…just to remind us that we are never in control.  That was today…and here is why.

  1. We started the morning by failing our annual fire inspection.  I guess that every year, you must have your fire extinguisher tested/reset/replaced/resomethinged.  WHO KNEW.  And as it turns out, ours hadn’t been looked at since April 17, 2014…which would make sense, because I didn’t even know testing fire extinguishers was a thing.  (In my defense, I feel like if testing fire extinguishers was your thing, you might just show up every year to remind the owner of the extinguisher that it was time to test it.  Or at least send a reminder postcard.)
  2. Jeanne was gone today and it would have been okay, but my children needed to be 8,315ish places today for various practices and appointments.  I went to my house no less than seven times to pick up or deliver someone and it is ridiculously difficult to accomplish anything when you are constantly driving somewhere.  And that has nothing to do with pies, but I bet if you’ve ever parented anyone, you just whispered “amen, sister…”
  3. At one point when I wasn’t taking someone somewhere, I pulled Katie’s tray of Key Lime pies out of the oven and they looked odd.  She had followed the recipe exactly, yet they just weren’t right.  She had noticed that the condensed milk consistency from the can was different…chunky on the top of the can lid and runny underneath.  The cans don’t expire until July 2017, but I threw every single Key Lime pie in the trash and texted our food broker that our condensed milk was “weird, gooey, and chunky.”  He offered me a credit, because I believe that is the industry standard response to a complaint of weird, gooey, and chunky.
  4. I absolutely had to go to our accountant’s office to sign some paperwork.  She’s been threatening me nicely for a month or so and I knew I was pushing the limit.  They are located  on the Business Loop across from Cosmo Park.  So basically, a 30 minute drive in 4 pm traffic from PJP.  Except when I got to the Business Loop, I realized that they had rerouted the entire interstate to build another roundabout, meaning the road was closed.  (And hey, if you are reading this and you have any influence, STOP WITH THE ROUNDABOUTS ALREADY).
  5. So I ended up in that diamond interchange at Stadium and 70 and I got confused and ended up back on the interstate.  And stuff like that never happens to me because I’m great with directions, so basically diamond interchanges are dead to me.  All of that for three minutes actually in the accountant’s office to sign some forms to pay some money to the government.  So they can use it to likely build some more roundabouts.  Gah.

I’m so not leaving PJP Buttonwood tomorrow.